The B Code with Kelly Merryman Turner

Welcome to The B Code! Over the past several episodes, we’ve explored what it means to live as a Bold, Independent, Tenacious, Confident, and Honest woman. But today, we’re taking that conversation even deeper as we explore healing, intuition, nervous system regulation, and the powerful connection between energy, emotions, and self-trust.

In this very special episode, I’m joined by my first guest ever on The B Code podcast, Kelly Merryman Turner—founder of Soul Ascend Frequency Healing, Reiki healer, yoga teacher, sound healer, and someone who became deeply instrumental in my own healing journey. Together, we have an honest and heartfelt conversation about anxiety, burnout, intuition, meditation, emotional regulation, and what it truly means to come back home to yourself. Kelly shares her own transformation from living in chronic stress and misalignment to stepping fully into a life rooted in healing and purpose. I also open up about my own experiences with anxiety, panic attacks, losing self-trust, and how reconnecting with myself changed everything. This episode is a reminder that healing isn’t about becoming someone new—it’s about remembering who you already are.

In this episode, you will learn:

• How the Body Speaks When You’re Out of Alignment: Why anxiety, burnout, emotional overwhelm, and physical symptoms can be signals that you’ve disconnected from your true self—and how learning to listen changes everything.
• The Connection Between Healing and The B Code: How Boldness, Independence, Tenacity, Confidence, and Honesty show up throughout the healing journey and help you reconnect to your intuition, self-trust, and inner peace.
• What Intuition Actually Feels Like: How to begin recognizing the difference between fear-based thinking and intuitive knowing—and why intuition often feels like calm clarity rather than anxiety.
• The Power of Meditation, Energy Work, and Gratitude: How practices like meditation, Reiki, sound healing, journaling, and gratitude can help regulate your nervous system, shift your energy, and create deeper alignment in your life.
• Why Healing Is a Practice, Not a Destination: How growth happens through consistency, curiosity, and learning to become kinder to yourself instead of waiting to feel “fixed” before you begin living fully.

This episode is brought to you by my upcoming book, How to Become a B.I.T.C.H. and Live Happily Ever After. This book is my heart and my story, and while it comes out later this year, you don't have to wait to start your transformation.

I created the FREE "B Code Starter Guide" just for you—five pillars, five practices, and one powerful shift so you can start living your B Code today. Download here: http://blossomlifeco.com/bcodestarterguide

Thank you so much for being here and supporting the launch of this podcast. I want you to know that as we begin this journey, I am your number one believer!

Stay Connected: If this episode touched your heart, please follow along on Instagram at @blossomlifeco and @thebcodebytiffany for more updates, tips, and empowerment.

Connect with Kelly Merryman Turner: Follow Kelly on Instagram at @ascendwithkelly and learn more about her work at www.sol-ascend.com

Transcript

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Tiffany 0:06

Welcome back to the Beacode Podcast, where we talk about becoming the most empowered, aligned, and authentic version of yourself using the Bee Code framework. Bold, independent, tenacious, confident, and honest. Today we're talking about something that so many women are curious about energy healing, emotional blocks, and how our nervous system and subconscious patterns affect the lives that we create. Today I'm joined by Kelly Turner, founder of the Soul Ascend Frequency Healing. She's also a Reiki healer who helps people release emotional and energetic blocks so that they can step into a more aligned and peaceful version of themselves. I first met Kelly at a meditation studio in Los Angeles called Unplugged, and I instantly connected to her energy, her authenticity, and her true love for everyone in her class. She really makes everybody feel special in her class. She is someone to this day that if I don't get my dose of Kelly at least once a week, I feel very unsettled. She has the most calming energy, which resonates in all of our interactions, as well as her classes. So I asked Kelly if she would be the first guest on my podcast, as she was one of the very first people that I connected with when I decided to go on my healing journey. Kelly, I am truly honored and so excited to have you here today. And I'd like, first of all, if you could just introduce yourself and tell a little bit about yourself, and then we'll start with the questions and everything else.

Kelly 1:32

Hi, sure. It's truly my honor to be here, Tiffany. And I'm so excited to be your first podcast guest. I've been following your journey and so proud of everything that you've accomplished. And to have an opportunity to come together and have fun like this is really special. So thank you. And I guess I'll just share a quick addition to my bio. In addition to being a Reiki healer, I'm a yoga teacher, which is actually how I started on this path. Yoga took me to Reiki, which took me to sound healing, which took me to somatic healing. And really all of the tools that I practice are really critical elements of how I share this healing with others. So I think of myself sometimes as my own guinea pig, the work that I do on myself, then translates into my direct experience and then becomes ways that I can help others move through similar things that I've moved through in my own life.

Tiffany 2:24

Okay. Thank you for sharing that. I do want to hear, was there like a moment or an exact moment in your life where you realized that something needed to change in your life?

Kelly 2:34

Yes, a very specific moment actually. I moved to LA about 10 years ago. And at the time my daughter was young. She was about four years old. My husband and I didn't have any family here. We had a small community of people that we were slowly starting to become friends with and to build that community. But for the most part, I was really alone. And I was in a very stressful job that I didn't love, to be honest. I really felt that the shift in my work that since I had moved from the East Coast felt very different here. So I was already feeling sort of a misalignment in what I was doing in my professional career and feeling like there was something more. And then one day, driving home from work in rush hour traffic in LA, which, if you know LA, driving on the 10 can be a very stressful experience. And I had a major panic attack. And I had to miraculously find my way to the side of the road where I pulled over and just started reflecting on my life. And it was the wake-up call that I needed to really start taking care of myself in a better way and to start tuning into myself. The yoga studio that was near my house had been calling me in my intuitive senses for several months beforehand. And so I took that moment as a sign that I needed to start there. And my first experience in the studio taking up in Yasa Flow class, I had just a magical, magical experience. It was the first time in, gosh, probably at least the three years I had lived in LA that I finally felt at peace within myself. And I knew that that was a feeling that I wanted to follow. I had no idea what was to come. And it ended up being the start of just a really beautiful journey of transformation and healing, where I began to follow the divine breadcrumbs. I began to really tune in to myself for the first time, probably ever, and to think about who I was, what I needed, what I wanted on a given day. I'm sure we'll talk more about this, but being a mother, we tend to live for our families. We tend to put our families and our children first and we often forget about ourselves. And that was certainly my first step into this world was learning how to mother myself again.

Tiffany 4:40

Yes, I hear you on that one. And we have so much in common because it seems like both of our healing journeys both started with a breakdown. And I talk about that in my podcast as well as my book. About that is what started my journey as well. You know, I had a health scare that led me to many doctors and hospitals, and nobody could tell what was wrong with me. There was nothing physically wrong with me. It's just that I had abandoned myself and I had a panic attack. And I don't know, yours was on the side of the freeway, which is pretty scary. Mine was at least in my backyard, and it lasted three hours, and it was three hours of uncontrollable crying. But I didn't realize later that that was a panic or an anxiety attack. So we have a lot of things in common. So I know you kind of already discussed a little bit about what led you to energy healing in Reiki. So I know you started this journey and you started with yoga. How many years ago is this? And what do you feel like has brought you the greatest change in your life?

Kelly 5:37

Great question. So this is probably about 10 years ago. It's been a about a decade of this healing journey in my life. Rush, no, I take that back. I've lived in Lena for 10 years. So it was about seven years ago. And it happened very quickly. It's hard to think sometimes that it's only been seven years because I feel like a completely different person and my life looks completely different than it did seven years ago. And I would say that the biggest thing that's changed really is that I know myself better. There's a beautiful yoga concept called Svadhyaya. And it's one of the guiding principles of my life. Svadhyaya means essentially self-study or study of sacred text. And I consider us, each of us, a sacred text of our own being. And the more you tune into your self-awareness to study what your true gifts are, to discover what your passions are. And then more than just the light, to understand the shadow side as well, to go deeper into parts of yourself that maybe you've hidden. Maybe, like you said, you've abandoned. Maybe you've thought you can't show up in a certain way because someone's told you that you're too much or not enough for all of the things that we're conditioned for. And I think the process of Svedya really teaches us the journey that we are all on here in this human experience to grow, to evolve. That the whole point of why our souls came here is to grow and have these lessons. And that we don't grow just in the places of life where it feels good and everything's going well. We actually grow when we step outside of our comfort zones, when things become challenging and difficult. That's when we expand. That's when we learn what we're really made out of. That's when we start to see things about ourselves that maybe come to light in new ways. And that process of spabyaya helps us discover how to come home to ourselves, how to come back to that place within ourselves that exists outside of all of the noise, all the things that say, you should be this way, or you should do this, or this is how you should show up in the world. And instead, who are we truly at our core? The authentic self. And we refer to this in Holy Fire Reiki, the authentic self is this piece within us that is the light. It's the connection to our divine spiritual selves. And that element connects with our very human self, who's here having a very human experience and all that comes with it. And when we can connect those two, the divine self and the human self, we start to understand who we truly are as a whole. And that wholeness is what creates health, I find. Wholeness and coming into balance with those two parts of ourselves help us find this greater ease and joy and connection and light that carries through into all aspects of our life.

Tiffany 8:23

Yeah, you, you know, I love that you said self-awareness because that seems to be the first step. And, you know, when you and I both experienced our panic attacks, I don't know how much self-awareness was occurring. But in other words, we had to get to that panic attack, which I always say, you know, my breakdown was my breakthrough. But I love that self-awareness uh you mentioned that because honesty is actually the first step in transformation. You have to see what's there before you can change it, right? And unfortunately or fortunately, I like to look at it more in a positive perspective. But fortunately that happened. I didn't really, you know, I wish I didn't have to have two frozen shoulders or that I had the heart palpitations or that I was in and out of hospitals and doctors' offices and test after test. But I tend, you know, to look always for the positive. And like you always say, and Tony Robbins, life is happening for you, not to you. And that was actually life happening for me. And it had to happen in order for me to become self-aware and to even know that there was anything to change because what I was doing is I was just abandoning myself. And that is where I was losing my identity. And like you said, being a mom, being a wife. For 26 years, this is my book, but I didn't have any hobbies. My hobby was my family. And I love that you, you know, mentioned that as a mom because when I see your energy, Kelly, in class and just outside, the calmness that you resonate is always something that I leave your classes and I just I walk out with that energy, and that energy allows me to quiet my mind so that I can actually get past the noise that we all have in our heads, and I can get past that to really learn about myself, but to hear what the universe is also telling me. And I've learned so much from you. So I thank you for that. I want to step into the first letter of my bitch code, bold independent, tenacious, confident, and honest. And B stands for bold. To me, it's like stepping into the unknown. And energy healing often requires courage, which I call, like I said, the beefer bold in my bee code framework. So I want to ask you, was it scary to step into this work professionally? Because I feel like you had to face a lot of yourself, but also to gain people to come see you, you have to be trusted. So if you can tell us a little bit about stepping into this work.

Kelly 10:39

Oh, absolutely. This role that I've taken on as a healer and to use that word healer, I actually find myself to be more of a guide and a facilitator to help others become their own greatest healers, to become their own greatest heroes and to become their own greatest love story. The role of the person that holds that space for you, such as me, is really to allow you the opportunity to get through the noise, to break through the barriers and to remind you that that power lies within you. And Reiki has been transformational for me in that respect. And you mentioned the calm energy, and it's it's such a wonderful thing to hear, but I also remind myself that wasn't always the case. I've struggled with anxiety my whole entire life, even since I was a little girl. I used to make myself so sick because I was so nervous. And even if I wasn't nervous about something, it was just getting excited. And they actually say that the frequency of anxiety and the frequency of excitement live on the same spectrum. The difference really is in your perspective of it. When you're anxious, you're thinking about what could go wrong. You're living in fear of what if something happens badly, or what if, like you said, in the unknown, there's something that you can't handle. On the opposite side, when you're excited about something, you're thinking about all the positive things that could come out of it. And the big shift for me has really happened when you realize that even the things that go wrong in that scary part, even when it takes the courage to step forward and you're trusting in the unknown, even when those things don't happen as we really expect them to, or we want them to ideally, there's still something to be gained. There's still an element of growth and transformation that's happening as a result of that. Sometimes we learn, actually, I would say most times we learn more about ourselves from the things that go wrong and that don't go the way that we hope versus the things that do. The things that do just give us the confirmation and the affirmation that we're on the right track, right? And they keep us in that same spot. But we grow through this process of making mistakes, of failing, quote unquote. And that was definitely when I first got into this work professionally and I left my corporate job, there was a lot at stake. I left a wonderful paying job with benefits and retirement and all of the things. And I gave it all up. I walked away from it to completely be on my own. And thankfully, I do have the support of my husband and my family, and I'm blessed in that respect. But there was still a lot hanging on can I create a living for myself doing what I love? And when you're doing things from your soul and you're putting so much of yourself out there, there's also a lot of expectation on the other side. And there's also a lot of fear of, oh, what if people don't like it? Or what if no one signs up? So I've been through all of those lessons. And I will say that each one has helped me get closer and closer towards that, and I shouldn't say where I'm going because the path is always unfolding in new ways. We never actually get there, right? There's never just this like endpoint where we reached it and we're like, oh, I've made it. Everything is wonderful. I can just take a load off now. There's always something more. And that's because our souls are still evolving and growing. If you're not continuing to grow, you kind of have to ask yourself why. And it's okay to be okay where we are and to celebrate that, absolutely. But then usually there'll be a calling, there'll be something in your soul that's pulling you in the direction that that growth is meant to be happening. And that's actually a really good thing to lean into, not one to lean away from. So this element of being bold and courageous that you speak of, it's being bold and courageous and taking that first step, but it's also being okay with knowing that even if something doesn't go the right way, even if you fail, which again, I don't like the word failure because it's not necessarily a failure. It's just another step on the path. Everything is just preparing us for who we're meant to become. And that's this process of transformation that happens when we say yes to it. My path has included this wonderful journey of helping others heal. And that's how I'm also healing in so many ways. I've grown more in these last few years of being a full-time healer and teacher and coach than I have in my probably entire adult life because it brings up to the surface everything that we need to be confronted with. All the things that maybe we were able to kind of slide under the rug or not pay as much of attention to, all of a sudden it's right there, front and center, asking you to step through it.

Tiffany 15:03

I hear you on that one. I learned so much about myself through coaching my clients. And, you know, you've answered uh the next question that I was going to ask you. So you always think people think of bold as being aggressive or loud or just out there. And for me, bold was meant something different. It was allowing myself to heal, but also letting go of the control that I had. I always felt like I had to be in control of everything and just trusting the universe instead of holding on to, you know, I've got to get the answer now and I've got to figure this out. And that's one thing that I've learned through my meditation and my coaching other clients, but also through your classes. I've learned to just let go. And that's a bold step in itself because especially someone like me, a control freak, it's really allowed me to just allow things to happen or when they do happen to me, I'm not holding on so tightly to an answer or to a result or to, you know, I'm letting it unfold in front of me as the universe is wanting it to unfold for me. And that's been hard for me. So as a parent, you know, I I know I've told you this before, I was the best helicopter parent out there. And I always tell people, I didn't just hover, I landed. And I thought I was the best mom at doing everything for my kids. And as you figure things out, I I realized that I also did a disservice to them because I didn't allow them to step into their bold selves. But it's all, like you said, it's all learning curves, it's all teaching moments, and it's your perspective about them. I want to move to the next letter, I, which is for independent. And I want to tie Reiki into personal empowerment and self-healing power, which I, like I said, call in independent. So I want to ask you, how can people begin connecting to their own energy without a practitioner? You know, I I was very fortunate that I started with Unplug a couple of years ago, but how can other people connect to their own energy without someone that maybe they can afford or classes they can afford?

Kelly 17:03

It's a great question because Reiki is something that is inside of each and every one of us. Rei in key is a Japanese word that essentially means spiritually life force guided energy. Rei is the spiritually guided portion and ki is energy. And we all have this ability to channel our own Reiki, to connect with that force within ourselves, to connect with spirit. When we're attuned to Reiki, we're able to open up to receive higher frequencies, to connect to the divine, to our higher selves, to the universe in a much greater way. And this connection for me is what really opened the door, blasted me open in so many ways in terms of my intuition and my own healing gifts and my own power. Again, connecting to that idea of our authentic selves. It just clearly aligns us with the path that we're meant to be on. And it's almost like a funnel. It sort of like narrows us down into what truly matters. And as we follow those breadcrumbs, it takes us to who and what we're meant to be. The portion of it that people think like, I can only be attuned to Reiki if I'm a Reiki healer is actually one of the most common myths. Being attuned to Reiki is for everyone. I like to say that Reiki is for everyone and Reiki is for life. So if that's something that is of interest to someone, being attuned to Reiki helps bring that emotional balance and peace and harmony into your life in a really beautiful way that also allows you to explore a deeper connection to self. But even outside of that, just beginning to tune in to yourself. Sometimes it can be hard to get past the walls of that. And that's where I found Reiki to be so, so helpful because it helps, it's it's like a quantum shortcut that takes us into that place of calm within ourselves that we can explore what's there. And meditation also does that. And when we spend time practicing meditation, we get better and better at it. It's not something that you can just do once and say, oh, I'm a terrible meditator. I'm never gonna do this again. No, a lot of people do that, right? They come to my class one time and they think like that was really hard or I couldn't get my mind to be quiet. And that's actually really normal, especially when you first start, because it's a practice. And the more you learn to be with yourself, the more you learn to be with your thoughts and to notice them instead of reacting to them, the easier the process gets and the deeper you can go within yourself. But it's not something that always comes easiest to most people. So having a guide, having classes that can help connect someone to ways of and strategies for ways of getting into a meditative state are really, really helpful. On your own, there's so much online to help. I mean, I think the beauty of technology is that we have everything at our fingertips, right? So even just tuning in to online meditations or meditation music and sitting in quiet stillness. And it doesn't have to be stillness, actually. I love walking meditations. They're one of my favorite ways to meditate, getting outside, connecting with spirit or all around us, connecting with nature. The practice of mindfulness and meditation really is focusing the energy in a way that allows the thoughts to come and go. And instead of reacting to everything that comes up, we start to observe them and to take some meaning from them of, okay, what is this showing me as opposed to, oh, why am I thinking this thought or ruminating over something? Meditation gives us the space, literally creating space in our lives where we can start to see it more clearly. And the more that we can create that space away from the noise, the more that we show up in that same state outside of our practice. It's not just a practice that stays on your mat that's actually a misnomer two of, oh, I'll just meditate and everything will be lovely. Well, yes, however, you have to carry that frequency with you. You have to find ways of remembering the practice in daily life. And this is why it truly is a practice. So the first step, really, and actually from myself, I will say I started with 30 seconds with the com app. 30 seconds. That was all I could meditate at first. It was just sitting there on my balcony in the morning before I got ready for the day and 30 seconds just in quiet, in peace, before my family was up, before the noise of the day started. And slowly that's grown. And I now have a morning practice where I do many different things and it shifts and changes depending on what I need in a given time of my life. But that morning practice has been a staple, probably the most consistent piece of my journey that is continued with me, that has grown and changed and evolved with me. But the more that you can be consistent with the practice, the more you start to see the big shifts in your life.

Tiffany 21:29

Yes, I can vouch for that because when I first started coming to your classes and unplug, I found it very difficult to quiet my mind. And the greatest thing is that you and as well as the other teachers or facilitators there, you know, you give us permission that if our mind does wander or if we do, you know, we do have noise that starts coming back in, that that's okay to let it go through you and let it work through you and always come back to your breath. And I agree with you, consistency is if I don't start my day. With meditation, I do feel a little off. But in the beginning it wasn't like that. It was a little bit harder. I also like to start my morning in gratitude because I feel if I wake up searching for things that are, you know, wrong starting with my day, then my day's gonna go wrong. So I start my day in gratitude and just in silence. And I always try and go outside. And if there's sun, which we're in California, which so it's almost every day, I try to get 15 minutes of just sunlight on my face just to absorb or ground myself and go onto my grass. I love that you, you know, you're encouraging our listeners that it does take practice and it may not feel comfortable. It may not even feel right, but it is working. And the more you do it, the more you can silence the noise in your head. And I feel I can relax and get to a deeper place. It's such a strange place to be when you're in a deep meditation and listening to your soundbass, Kelly. It takes me to it's between dream and you know, I'm still having thoughts, but yet it almost feels like REM sleep.

Kelly 22:56

It's just so But I like to call the quantum zone of healing. Yes. Yes. It's but that's it is a magical space to be because when we enter that place and sound is a really powerful way of getting there because it helps our mind settle into a space where if you, especially if you have an active mind like me, sound can really help drop you into that space where your mind quiets. But in that space, healing and transformation happens so much more so than in any other time in our life. Our bodies have a chance to rest, our minds are quiet, but we're also connected to something so much greater. And this might be getting a little bit too out there for your audience, but to remember that there is a force around us, a quantum field, quantum energy. There's so many things that people call it, right? But tuning into that energy, tuning into that force truly starts to create miracles in our lives. There's infinite source of possibilities that lies within that space. And when you take time to really connect to it on a daily basis, it's transformational. It's to truly just attune you to this higher level frequency. And gratitude, like you mentioned, is the shift. Gratitude and elevated emotions in your meditation are such a powerful way of shifting out of whatever negative state you might be in. It's truly the alchemical process that happens both somatically in our bodies and in our minds when we shift into an elevated state. And there's lots of science behind all of that as to why and the chemicals that are produced. But when you drop into that deep state, your body is healing itself, your mind is healing itself. And there's all of these emotions that show up in the body as a result through the chemical process that happens that truly makes it a magical experience. It's it's a little bit of science, a little bit of magic, as I like to say. And we can explain some of it and we can explain all of it. There's researchers, Joe Dispenses is one of my favorite teachers. And he's working with so many different researchers in the Heart Math Institute and other places where they're actually looking at what happens to our brains in meditation. And it's fascinating. It's not even just our brains, it's our whole bodies that something just really miraculous is happening. So maybe over time we'll start to understand the process a little bit more. But again, that also comes back to having faith and trust in the unknown and that unseen realm around us is a very important part of why we're here and how to tune into it.

Tiffany 25:28

Yes. And like Joe Dispenza says, you need to have a clear intention with an elevated emotion. And when I work with my clients through creative visualization exercises, you can have a clear intention, but if you don't have the elevated emotion that comes with that intention, you don't get the full effect. And I've seen miracles happen, synchronousies when I practice what Joe Dispenza is talking about. And like you said, it is science. So if people are listening and they think it's like voo voo, you know, like something out there, it's actually science. I mean, there's energy and it's the laws of attraction, it's all of that. I love this because also independence in the B code isn't just about doing life alone. It's about knowing your power lives inside of you. And thank you for sharing with our audience that people do have the ability to heal themselves because you do. You don't have to go out outside of yourself to heal yourself. But I know that for me, going to meditation and sound bath classes, I give up my phone. So you can't bring your phone into the room. So there's no interruptions that way. Everybody is in the same space, everybody's there for the same reason. And you can actually just devote 45 to 60 minutes, whatever the class length is, to just getting into your body. So I'd like to move on to T for Tenacious, which is the T in my B code. So I want to ask you: do people expect healing to happen instantly? And what do you say to that?

Kelly 26:56

Some people do. And some people think that they can come to a sound bath or meditation class once in a while and their life will change. And unfortunately, that's not the case. As I mentioned, it's truly a practice, but it's more than just treating the symptoms. If you go to one sound bath or have one Reiki session, yes, it can be transformational and change something in your life that's bringing a greater awareness. But when you're only treating the symptoms, you can't get to the root cause of what's actually causing the suffering or the pain or whatever else is going on. And so the process of uncovering what's underneath the surface and going deeper within yourself helps to bring a greater level of healing. And I've definitely experienced that in my own journey, especially as I became a somatic healer and went through a very rigorous six-month training program where we were actively being coached and we were coaching others and we were going through the process of going deep into various frameworks of what's at the root cause of a behavior or a pattern or understanding how this energy is showing up in the world in maybe a way that doesn't feel good or doesn't feel aligned. And once you start being able to examine those patterns and those behaviors and reactions, you can start to address them. And one of the best ways is getting into a space through meditation or sound healing or really being able to regulate your nervous system into safety first and foremost. And then take a look at what's under the surface. Start to feel in your body what happens when you think of a memory or a situation that may have happened in your past. And I feel that the tenacious piece of it really comes into play because it's not for the faint of heart. It's very easy to be like, this is too much. I have to, I'm gonna just ignore all of this and walk away from it and suffer in silence. But the more tenacious you are to know that you've got you, that you're not gonna abandon yourself, that you're gonna stay with yourself and you're gonna move and grow through it. That takes that tenacity and that commitment and the consistency to really keep going. And healing doesn't always have to be so hard. I think this is another myth in the healing work that healing has to be hard and it feels, you know, it can just lead to a lot of other things. And healing is definitely an onion, but there are so many ways to make it really beautiful and fun. And I I definitely make that a key priority with my own clients to make it something where you leave a session and you feel like, yes, you had a breakthrough. Yes, it may have been challenging to be confronted with something in that moment, but oh my gosh, it feels so good on the other side. And you had fun doing it too. Like he actually gets to be fun. So I think my sound is fun. I I hope you would agree with me when I completely agree.

Tiffany 29:37

I honestly, if I if I go even a couple days without going, I literally feel misaligned. And it actually has been so much fun because I feel the energy that's changed within me. If I start to feel like I'm on overdrive at any part of my day, I just look on the Unplugged app and I look for a meditation to do, or I actually love going to the classes. So it has completely changed my life. And I know now, you know, through breath work and what you've taught us, and that breathing is one of the easiest things that anybody can adopt. You can do breath work and your body knows that you're in a safe place by just breathing a different way.

Kelly 30:19

Yeah, that's and I should have mentioned that actually when you were asking about strategies for people, especially who might be newer to this or not have access to, you know, we are very fortunate in LA that we have access to so many amazing practitioners, but tuning into your breath, using your breath as an anchor point, working with your breath, even just taking a slow, deep breath in the car before a meeting, in your office, wherever you need, just to reconnect with your breath, take slow, long breaths, letting the exhale be longer than the inhale. And then my favorite somatic practice is humming, humming the exhale. Your vibration, your sound is the most powerful sound healing instrument for you. So by tuning into that vibration and humming the exhale, it does lots of amazing things scientifically and polyvagal theory talks about this, but from a just very basic nervous system perspective, it sends that signal through the body that it's safe and that you can start to relax in that moment. So humming and breathing two very simple ways, anywhere you are, to really tune into calm.

Tiffany 31:25

Oh, I have an interesting question for you because lately I've been humming a lot when songs come on and I'm not even seeing the words, I'm humming, and I never did that before. So that's interesting that you're maybe it's from your classes. You're remembering.

Kelly 31:39

And you're remembering. We all have knowledge that comes through in in different times. I like to say it's like our higher selves giving us a little clue. But when that stuff happens, when those little synchronicities come through, it's really important to pay attention and to lean into that. The biggest case of my practice right now, my personal morning practice, is chanting and humming. And I just felt so called to it. I always do some form of this, but this practice intentionally is my sound sadhana, I call it. And sadna is a spiritual practice, one that you do every day, ideally. But it is so powerful when you tune into your own sound, working with your voice. And I've discovered so much power in myself by working with my own voice. I used to hate the sound of my voice, Tiffany. And it's so funny when someone will compliment my voice after a class and say it was soothing or that it helped them. And that makes me feel so good from not a self-validation perspective, but this idea of wow, my voice has healing power. And I have worked with that and consciously stepped through so many hurdles in my own world to find that power within myself. So for you, I will say like lean into that power. Your voice is calling you home.

Tiffany 32:49

Another thing that I've adopted is something I came back home to is dancing. Yeah. And now I just turn on music later in the day when I just want to shake everything off. And I just turn on my favorite songs and I just dance in my office. So that's something else that others can do just to get into your body because we don't get into our bodies enough. We're always in our heads. And I feel like when I dance, I'm definitely in my body. So that's something else that I've kind of picked up just recently, and I absolutely love it.

Kelly 33:18

That's such a powerful somatic method. Really, we're so disconnected from our bodies. When we're stuck in anxiety and ruminating thoughts, we're not in our bodies. So somatic healing really focuses on getting us in our bodies, somatic body awareness. Dancing and shaking are two very easy practices that you can do anytime, anywhere, or maybe not anywhere. But yes, I love that. It's so powerful to combine that with the voice. So dancing and singing and using music as a really cathartic tool as well.

Tiffany 33:49

Okay, now we're gonna move to C for energy and self-worth. So I want to connect confidence to the nervous system regulation, which relates to energy and self-worth. And the C for confidence in my framework, I want to pose these questions to you because I know that women are always talking about lack of confidence, lack of this, lack of that, lack of self-trust. And for me, I feel like how I lost confidence, how I lost self-belief, how I became doubtful of myself was that I abandoned myself. That's what I believe is why women lack confidence is that they abandon themselves. And they abandon themselves like I did in my marriage of 25 years, and we talked about that, how I became a mom and a wife, and that was my life, and that was my identity. And I didn't know how to come home to myself. And I think that's why my body was screaming out for me and it was, you know, it was talking for me. So I want to ask you, how do you feel like emotional energy affects confidence?

Kelly 34:44

Very much so. So the mind, body, spirit connection cannot be understated. And unfortunately, modern medicine doesn't always view that holistic perspective. More and more that's changing, and integrative medicine has become more mainstream. But our emotions and how we feel has such a huge effect on how we show up in the world. Joe Dispenza talks a lot about this. Your thoughts become emotions, become looped in the body, become this creation that your body is then believing it, and that becomes beliefs and that becomes your personality, becomes how you're showing up in the world. But it's a cycle that you can break. And it all starts with first and foremost, the feeling in your heart. When you get really clear and connect it to your heart, you can begin to reprogram it, tune back in to love, to joy, to gratitude, to those elevated emotions that we were speaking of. And confidence is among that, right? So in a lot of my sessions, and I know you've been in many of them, where we really tune in to a feeling that you want to embody. Because when you're in, and it doesn't have to be a meditation, but I find it's more powerful in meditation. When you program your heart to feel an emotion, it starts to create that effect in your body. Your body starts to produce those chemical reactions so that you feel like that and you begin to show up like that. You start to take those small little steps that feel good the more and the more that you do them to have more confidence, to have more courage, tenacity, all the things that you're referring to in your B code. And sometimes confidence can be shaken by the things that hold us back, like perfectionism or self-worth, all of these core wounds that we come into this life to really work through. I study Kabbalah and Kabbala talks about it from the perspective of our soul correction. I find it's not so much a correction as it is a path of growth and learning. And where we sort of lose ourselves, as you mentioned, like abandoning ourselves in that process shows us where we've come off that course, where we need to step back onto it. So having that confidence starts by taking time out of all of the noise, all of the things that are telling us that are affirming to us that we're not enough for, you know, whatever is keeping us back from feeling confident, and to remember that we have everything we need within ourselves. And once we can restore that balance and that feeling within us, we can start to work on the reasons why and how we can start to make those shifts in our life. It's not just one strategy, it's not just one way of tuning in and all of a sudden you're showing up in the world a different way. It's again that practice and learning what works for you and what you need at a given time to shift you out of a state where you're not feeling so confident and what's triggering this lack of confidence. And when you understand, again, bringing in that sped ya approach, when you understand who makes you feel less confident, why you feel less confident around certain groups of people or in certain situations, that can start to help you shift how you rewire those beliefs or where your energy might not be aligned, where you might not be set up for success in certain situations. And sometimes I've found in my own life, the more I'm around people that have my best interest at heart and who really want to see me shine, the more I'm able to step into my competence and my passion and my purpose. I feel safe to do that. Yes. So sometimes you need to look at where in your life you don't feel safe and why.

Tiffany 38:11

I love that. That resonates. And talking about where I was at, you know, I it was I lost self-trust. I did not trust myself. I talk about it again in my book that I couldn't even order at a restaurant. I didn't even have an opinion. It's not that someone silenced me. I definitely silenced myself and I just kind of went along. I knew what everybody else's dream was, I knew what they wanted to eat, but I didn't know myself. I moved so far away from myself that, like you said, I had to create safety within myself so that and and I had to become curious and aware. But, you know, speaking about Western doctors and Western medicine, being in and out of hospitals and checking my lungs and my heart, I would go in and my blood pressure was 190. Does that sound crazy? I think that's what it was. But it was so high that the doctor said, You've got to calm down because we've got to be able to take this again and make sure that this is not correct. And it was seven months of this where nobody could tell me the diagnosis or why I was feeling this way. And I went to a third generational Chinese medicine doctor far away. And he literally just held my wrist and didn't even speak English. And I walked over to the herb counter and got my herbs. And the next day, and I'm not kidding, the next day, it was as if they were magic bills. I had no heart palpitations. I still had frozen shoulders. That took about two years to work through. But the Western doctors wanted to still put me on heart medicine. And when I questioned it, which is something else that we'll talk about, which is honesty, is that you have to trust your intuition. And I questioned the doctor, why would you put me on heart medicine if you just said there's nothing wrong with my heart? And they said, Well, you know, let's just, it's a precaution. I didn't know that what I had done is I just was going through anxiety and had a panic attack. And because I'd moved so far away from me, my body was screaming out, come back home, like you talk about.

Kelly 39:58

Great example of we treat the symptoms, not the root cause. And unfortunately, a lot of modern medicine is set up this way where it's looking at, okay, well, how do we control the symptoms that you're experiencing? I was put on antidepressants for my anxiety. And that's a whole other conversation. I will say that there is a time and a place where antidepressants are really, really helpful. I think it can help us get past the veil where the other work, the more holistic work, can actually get in and be received. But sometimes you're in such high beta, such high anxiety, you can't even get to that place for healing to happen. So there is, I'm not saying that antidepressants are a bad thing, but I know for myself that once I finally could trust myself and knew how to use the tools that I was given, I was able to get off of them and I was able to go back to the things that had always worked for me. But sometimes we just need a little extra help, right? And so that's not always a bad thing, but too often people are looking for take a pill and it'll make everything better. And you even asked that question earlier of like, do people expect that instant gratification healing? Yes. They go to doctors and they're like, oh, I'm having anxiety, I'm having high blood pressure. Doctor gives them a pill. And so they think things will be better. But again, it's symptom management. It's not necessarily getting to the cause of why someone is feeling a certain way and why something is happening in your life and how to get a better grasp of control. And control is not a bad word in this sense, it's more of regulation, a sense of being able to manage yourself in a way that your body is responding to the other work that you're doing.

Tiffany 41:27

Yes. And when when I told my cardiologist that I took these, I think it was 15 pills three times a day. I can't remember what it was that I took, but he was so shocked. And it's strange that none of the modern medicine or Western medicine doctors were even expressing anything about possibly being anxiety. It was just, let's see what's wrong with you. It was so interesting. My other natural path said, Well, the frozen shoulders are from you actually literally and figuratively carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders. And that was a way that I had heard it that just made so much sense to me. So I want to bring it back to the H for honest, which for me is intuition and alignment. And it's to me one of the most important letters of my BeCode framework because honesty, if you can't be honest with yourself by first becoming aware and recognizing that you have to change, you have to get quiet with yourself, you have to be curious about growth and want to grow. And like you say, if you're not curious about growing, you're going to stay stuck. And had I not been curious and going inward, I would probably still have the anxiety that I had. So to me, honesty is very, very important. I want to ask you, how can you tell if you're out of alignment? Or how can you tell if when your clients that you work on are out of alignment and they're not living in their honest self?

Kelly 42:47

You start to see things happening in their body, first and foremost. The body is always sending us signals. Emotions are messengers, and so emotions that are coming through can very much mean that we're out of alignment. I know for myself, when I start doubting myself or start doubting my path and fear starts creeping in, I start to see it energetically in the way things are happening in my world. All of a sudden, I'm not getting opportunities or things are not aligning as they once were. And that's a little bit of a law of attraction, but it's also me not taking steps towards what's true for me. I'm I'm trying to be something else or trying to maybe walk someone else's path instead of my own. And that starts to show me, oh, okay, let's take a step back here. Let's get really clear and grounded on what is aligned for me, what feels most important to me in this moment. Not so much what I think I should be doing, or not so much what everyone else is doing or expects me to do, but what feels really aligned in my body. And that's not always an easy process. It It's absolutely a skill and learning how to trust and tune into your intuition and true tune into the emotions that are messengers in the body takes practice, just like we were talking about. It's not something that you can just snap your fingers and all of a sudden you're in alignment, right? It's being on this path and like you said, being really honest with yourself about what feels good to me in this moment. One of the things I've been talking about in my class a lot this year as we're moving into such big energy is manifestation is a process of transformation, first and foremost. When we become the versions of ourselves that are ready to hold whatever it is that we're calling in, it starts to align. We start to show up as that version. Things start to just naturally align in a really beautiful way. But when we're out of alignment, when we're not tuned in to our soul's true desires and we're chasing something for the sake of the ego or not that money is a bad thing either, but when we're chasing things just for money or for the self alone, it doesn't always feel so much like flow. We start to feel like we're in a little bit of like hustle or burnout mode, right? We're just doing all the things and keeping things going, but maybe it's not happening as fluidly or as in alignment as if it would be if we were more aligned with really what it is that we're connecting to. So this idea of being honest with ourselves starts with really taking a hard look at the things in our lives and why are they in our lives?

Tiffany 45:31

Right. Questioning. The biggest things I learned is I started to question when something felt off. Why is this feeling off? Why, who am I around that's making me feel off? And then listening, like you said, to your intuition and maybe not spending so much time around those people who are making you feel off. But I really started to get curious and ask myself a lot more questions when I started my healing journey. And I learned that also through therapy. I think if you ask yourself questions and you're open enough and honest enough to answer them, you you start recognizing who and what you want in your life and who and what you don't want in your life. And it starts to become a little bit clearer, I feel.

Kelly 46:10

Yeah. I love journaling and automatic writing after a meditation. It's a really powerful way of tuning into a deeper truth. So if there's a question or if you're feeling unaligned, you can start to just pose that question to your higher self, even to your higher power of what do I need to shift right now in my life? Where do things feel difficult or hard or unaligned with who I want to be? And after a meditation, just letting yourself write free flow on paper, whatever comes through. And you don't always have to make sense of it. Sometimes things come out and you're like, wait, this doesn't make any sense until all of a sudden, a week later, some synchronicity occurs and you're like, oh, okay, I can tie the two together now. So allowing that information to flow through you for you to really channel that wisdom, that creative genius that lives within you, that inner knowing. And then to get it out into the world. Sometimes being in your head can be a tough place to be, right? When you have all these thoughts and you're trying to make sense of it all. But the more that you can get it out, whether you're talking it out or moving it out through your body or writing it out, it's a really powerful way of moving that energy through.

Tiffany 47:18

Yeah, I know you spoke about this a little bit, but for the beginner, someone who, you know, hasn't been going to meditation or hasn't begun their healing journey, what would you say intuition feels like in the body? Because I did not feel it. My body screamed out for it, but I would have liked to have caught it before. So I know you kind of talked a little bit about this, but maybe you can explain it for a beginner, what it feels like.

Kelly 47:41

For me. And I think for everybody it might feel a little different, but a general consensus that I think most people would agree to is that intuition feels like a calm knowing. When you think about something and it comes through with just this calm clarity, that's intuition speaking. If it comes through with this energy of anxiety or fear, it's based in ego. Love remembering that when you feel something and it feels just like this lightness, or when you receive a download, it's sort of just this like epiphany, like an aha moment. And those can come at any time. It comes more often when we're getting quiet enough to really tune in and listen. Happens to me a lot when I'm driving long road trips. I get all sorts of downloads, but there's no right or wrong way to experience it. Some people have more clairvoyant gifts, and clairvoyance really is a skill that can be trained. Everyone has clairvoyant powers. It's that sixth sense that animals have, that nature has, also lives within us. And we forget that. We think of it as this woo-woo thing, but other animals possess these qualities all throughout nature. But it's a matter of really tuning in to what that voice sounds like in our bodies, how it feels in our bodies and how it speaks to us. Every person is different. When I teach Reiki, I work a lot, especially with uh Reiki healers who are going on to the master level. And that's one of the things we really talk about in my mentorship is that your ability to channel, and Reiki opens up this energetic library of all sorts of intuitive gifts that you can tap into. But when you create that channel within yourself, you start to open to receive intuition in new and clearer ways. And the more that you can spend time connecting to it in whatever way works for you, that channel that's opened for you, that gift, whether it's clear knowing or some people are clear audience, they hear things coming through in sound or music. I've definitely experienced that. And I think part of it is why I became a sound healer. But we all have really beautiful, intuitive gifts. They're all there ready to be unlocked and explored. And learning how to acknowledge that and experience it in your body is the first step to being able to trust it and follow it.

Tiffany 49:52

Wow. I love that, Kelly. You just clarified it for even me. And I've been on this healing journey for a couple of years now. If you could share one message before I ask you if you can lead us into a meditation or an exercise, what would the one message that you think people need to hear right now, today on this podcast?

Kelly 50:11

I think that I've been coming back to, which was a message that was actually shared with me in a client session. I was helping him and he shared this beautiful message that really just was so simple and how it resonated. Be kind to yourself. When we are kind to ourselves first and foremost, we tend to be kinder to others. We tend to show up in the world as the best version of ourselves. But when we are beating ourselves up or angry with ourselves or pushing ourselves too hard, too much in the hustle mode, we are not creating any miracles. We're not creating love. We're not creating this beautiful light that is meant to be revealed in the world. So it all starts with first and foremost, being kind to yourself.

Tiffany 50:53

Oh, so many people are so kind to others and they know how to be, but they don't know how to be kind to themselves. And it's kind of like what we talked about in person about filling your own cup. And if you can't fill your cup, you're certainly not going to be able to fill those around you. And you will be empty. And emptiness causes burnout. But starting with yourself sounds amazing. And I think self-care is finding out where you can self-care, self-love, and where you can just go back to self and what makes you feel good and start recognizing your own needs. I had to go back to, oh my gosh, what are my needs? What are my desires? I don't even know what I desire. So thank you for saying that, being kind to yourself and starting with that. That's an important entry point. If you wouldn't mind to make this amazing podcast more memorable with you being a part of it, would you be willing to guide us through something grounding or just energy, a reset exercise? I don't know, a breath exercise or something that you're so good at.

Kelly 51:53

Oh, thank you, my love. Yes, I'd be honored to lead a short little exercise for your listeners here. Thank you. So I'll invite our listeners, if you are somewhere that you can take a pause for a brief moment with us and to help integrate everything you've just listened to. We just shared a lot of really powerful information. And giving it a chance to assimilate as you take a breath, a beat, to come back home to yourself, starting by coming into your body wherever you are, landing in your body, sitting up nice and tall. And as you ground through the base of your spine, your sitting bones, feel the chair or the earth that's holding you. Imagine a golden cord at the base of your spine. And imagine that this beautiful light, this energy can root down into the ground beneath you. Connecting to the infinite power, the infinite source of this beautiful planet we call home. And as you tether it, as you connect it deep down, you can begin to draw energy up into your body. And starting with a breath, breathing in long and slow. Bringing it into your heart, carrying it all the way to the top of your head, holding this breath here for a moment, holding this energy in with a nice sigh. Let it go with an ah once more. Feel your belly expand. Feel your heart open. Carry the light all the way to the top of your head. Feel it expand within you. And with that gentle ah sound, let something go here. Feel your shoulders soften down away from your ears. The top of your head lift towards the sky above you. Connecting you to the heavens, to your higher power, your angels, your higher self. Connect it above and below. Imagine these two energies meeting in the middle in your heart space. Letting it rest in this space of love. Bringing to mind something in this moment that you are so incredibly grateful for. A blessing in your life. What a miracle it is to live in this beautiful, complex body. Let that sense of gratitude expand. Feel it spread over you. So much so that your lips even curl up in a gentle smile. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Tiffany 55:15

Thank you.

Kelly 55:17

And then placing your hands over your heart. Feeling this energy within us. And then sending it out to the world. Taking one final cleansing breath in. Breathing in love, joy, gratitude. And breathing it out. And when you're ready, you can gently float the eyes open. You allow them to close. Come back into the rest of your day carrying forward this new frequency that you've created in just a few moments.

Tiffany 56:11

Wow. I feel like the word thank you when you said thank you, thank you, thank you, is so powerful.

Kelly 56:17

It is one of the most powerful phrases I think you can say. There's lots of reasons why words shift our state. But thank you, sending it out as a prayer, sending it out as a message that gratitude is your current state. And when we tune into gratitude, we allow ourselves to receive even more. It's this idea that when we're attuned to gratitude, what we have is already enough. And that attracts what it is that we're calling in. And so it's not just a sense of being grateful, just as things are in this moment, that's such a powerful state to live from. Needing nothing, desiring all that's meant for us.

Tiffany 56:56

Yes, thank you. I want my listeners to be able to connect with you and find you. If you can let our listeners know where they can find you, Kelly.

Kelly 57:07

Absolutely. So Instagram is a great way to connect with me, and I'd love to hear from your viewers. It's ascend with Kelly, A-S-C-E-N-D with Kelly, K-E-L-L-Y. And I'm sure you'll put this in your show notes so they can check it out there.

Tiffany 57:24

Of course.

Kelly 57:25

And then my website is www.soul s o l-ascend.com. And I'd love to hear from any of our viewers or our listeners and get their perspective on what may have resonated. It would be a joy.

Tiffany 57:42

Yes. And I also want to let our listeners know that if you are in the LA area, Unplug is one of the places that Kelly guides her. I'm a student. I like to call myself a student of yours, but we're all students. That's right. But she also has retreats. And I've been to a retreat or two of hers and they're all around LA. But if someone cannot contact you or possibly they're not in your area, can they have privates with you? Can they do something via Zoom or work with you privately if they don't have to be in your presence, correct?

Kelly 58:13

No, not at all. I do a lot of virtual sessions and virtual trainings. So definitely reach out if something resonated. And I would love to speak with you and get on my email list. I do regular virtual sound baths, which are free and just an incredible way to connect in shared community and shared healing. But yes, would love to see anyone unplug. If you're new to Unplug, come be my guest for the first time. And I teach at several other studios in and around LA as well. So definitely reach out.

Tiffany 58:38

Wonderful. I want my audienced listeners to remember that your power isn't outside of you. And as Kelly has spoken so eloquently, it's already within you. And the B code is simply the permission to access it. So I want to thank you so much, Kelly, for being my first guest, my guinea pig on my podcast. As it was so fitting to have you on it as my first guest, as you were, like I mentioned before, were one of the very first people who became so extremely instrumental in my healing and my awareness. And I'm so desiring wanting to work with you privately. And that's something we'll talk on the side. But I will most likely see you this week in one of your classes. And like you said before, thank you, thank you, thank you. And I'm returning that to you because your soul is so beautiful and I'm so blessed to just had you in my life. So I just want to thank you for everything.

Kelly 59:34

All of the feeling is uh so mutual, and I'm so honored to be your guest and can't wait to see the success of this podcast. You're amazing, and the B code is truly just next level. So, congratulations.